A few days ago I came upon an article that simply had me flabbergasted. The story was about a Mom and her disappointment with the Nanny she hired. The Mom, as far as I could tell, was pretty free with her time but chose to hire someone to take care of her two children; one an infant; the other a toddler. The Mom’s disappointment stemmed from the fact that when she’s around the Nanny leaves it to the Mom to be with her children.
Hold on a minute! Isn’t that the function of a Mother? I can understand having a Nanny to care for the children when the Mom is out to dinner; when the Mom is cooking; when the Mom is at work; when the Mom is out-of-town; when the Mom wants to take a nap or all of the aforementioned but shouldn’t the Mom want to take care of her own children if not the whole day at least part of the day when she’s in the house?
To top it all off, the Mom hired a “Nanny Doctor” to find out what was wrong with the Nanny. There’s a doctor for everything now-a-days. This Nanny spoke three languages, had excellent recommendations and was prompt and had a nice personality, but she stepped aside to allow the children to be with their Mother, and this Mother found fault with that. I have heard of everything but this one had me stymied. Frankly, I cannot see anything wrong with the Nanny but the Mom has some serious issues and should be seen by her own doctor about child rearing.
The story continues to interview the Nanny Doctor who provides several case studies that she has overseen. One of them had me jump out of my skin. A high-powered professional Mom, the doctor said, provides a “mission statement” to her Nannies (that’s right, she has four Nannies for one child) as to how her child was to be brought up. Really?!? a mission statement? Are children raised like a business plan now?
I would think when someone decides they want children they would like to raise them to instill their values and show some warmth and love. But that’s me. When I was raising my two sons I worked full-time and had someone home to care for my boys until I returned in the afternoon. Still, I took them to school in the morning; I cooked dinner and ate with them; checked their homework; and prepared them for bed at night with a warm hug and lots of kisses (to their exasperation; though I think they really loved it).
So now the question is are children being brought into this world to be taken care of by someone else? Even if the person hired to watch over their charges is warm, comforting and loving, she’s not the parent. What’s the point in having children if there is no time or desire to be with them?